The Mental Health Thread

[PumpkinPie86]

I think it's quite clear that I'm a bit mental. I'm having a bad time at the moment, everything seems to be going wrong. To write everything out would take a long time, so I'm going to leave these here before taking a few days off the forum. Although this may sound like drunk post, it isn't.

[PumpkinPie86]

I need a break from myself

[Felidae]

I'm feeling so frustrated that I can't just be my 'normal' self. My anxiety had calmed down a little over the past week but hit me again last night, my heart started pounding and I had a lump in my throat, just wanted to cry and give in.

It almost feels like I'm feeling/seeing everything in hyper reality, like the content little world around me isn't real and that there's something underlying it.
I just want to go back to not getting that sinking feeling whenever I let the intrusive thoughts continue and break through and live my life without that little voice in the back of my head making me feel scared of the future.

I'm scared that while I'm happy with the life I have I'm not really doing anything with it either.

[Scarred_pierced]

Saz have you been to the doctor about your anxiety? I know it's been going on for a long time but I can't remember if you have ever taken anything for it. I can vouch for the fact they do help, 'normal' life was very difficult, even now I get weird about stuff and can have little freak outs but nothing compared to what I was like.

[Felidae]

I haven't yet, I guess I've been hoping that things will calm down and I'll be able to control it, which I seem to be able to for the most part. I just wish I knew why it even started!

[Scarred_pierced]

Could have been anything, maybe stress?

[Felidae]

I don't remember feeling particularly stressed at the time, I was sitting at work and it was like my brain suddenly started asking me loads of questions about my relationship and I started feeling panicky and it's been up and down like that since then. It's been a lot better during the last week but still seems to be there running in the background.

[Scarred_pierced]

You should probably talk to someone professional, as they might be able to shed some light on it for you. I hope things get better for you, it's horrible having a little voice making you second guess your life all the time.

[Boo]

I'm feeling so frustrated that I can't just be my 'normal' self. My anxiety had calmed down a little over the past week but hit me again last night, my heart started pounding and I had a lump in my throat, just wanted to cry and give in.

It almost feels like I'm feeling/seeing everything in hyper reality, like the content little world around me isn't real and that there's something underlying it.
I just want to go back to not getting that sinking feeling whenever I let the intrusive thoughts continue and break through and live my life without that little voice in the back of my head making me feel scared of the future.

I'm scared that while I'm happy with the life I have I'm not really doing anything with it either.

Some of what you describe esp the last part is exactly how I could have explained how I felt about 8-10 years ago. I hated it but soon as I got help and put on meds (counselling didn't work for me). It went and tbh it helped me put my life and place in society into perspective and that's all I needed, was a clear head to see what was really going on and I've never looked back since. Wasn't on the meds for all that long either.

I'd deffo speak to someone about it. As for why it can simply be a chemical imbalance in the brain, anxiety and depression can be caused by such. I had nothing really going bad or wrong in my life but would worry and fret all the time.

[Felidae]

I did wonder if it could be caused by some kind of imbalance, it seemed to happen around the time I was a day or so late in starting my next packet of pills in September.

I'm glad that there are people like you guys that understand the thoughts I've been having, I've found them so hard to explain to Andy and he tries to be as understanding as he can but I can't expect him to get it when I don't!

I think I will make an appointment to speak to my GP and see what they say/recommend. I've had a short course of CBT sessions before for my misophonia so I guess I can expect something similar. Feel a bit uneasy about the idea of potentially relying on meds to feel 'normal' but it's reassuring that they may not be a long-term thing.

Thanks you guys <3