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Thread: What are your thoughts on marriage?

  1. #1
    Senior Member tacosareyummeh's Avatar
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    Default What are your thoughts on marriage?

    I'm wondering what everyone thinks about.
    When the right time is to get engaged/married and how long the engagement should be.
    Whether you believe in it or think they can last, etc.
    Also, who do you think should propose?
    Traditional with the man or contemporary with the female?
    I know I'd rather the guy propose to me, but if I thought the time was right and we'd talked about it with a likelihood of it happening and they just hadn't made the move yet I'd probably do it myself.

    My personal opinion is that marriage is lovely but some people rush into it only to end up divorced anyway.
    I would never want to be proposed to earlier than a year into a relationship and wouldn't marry someone without living with them for at least 6 months first.
    The engagement to me should last at least a year to me just to make sure things can last that long, why not wait if it's meant to be yanno?

    I'm hoping I can be married by 22, at the latest 25.
    Maybe it sounds young for some and naive of me with me being only 18 and all, but if I can get married earlier then why not?
    And not just because, it's just I feel like I'd like to get my life/family started asap, as long as it's with someone I think I could be with forever.
    Last edited by tacosareyummeh; 10-15-2009 at 02:04 PM.
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  2. #2
    Senior Member cherryd69's Avatar
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    imo i dont think time really plays a part in it, i was with my ex for 11yrs we got as far as engagement...

    I was with Nick for a little over 4 months an we were living together an engaged, we have a child on the way... tbh i couldnt be happier if i tried...

    spose my point is, you could be with someone for yrs an yrs an yrs and end up splitting... does that mean it was a waste of ur time an ur life?

    my mum an dad have been together 30 odd yrs this yr.. theres was a quick engagment an a quick marrige...

    i think it all depends on the ppl
    ~Hi im Dawn~

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  3. #3
    Senior Member x_Clover_x's Avatar
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    I think it all depends on the people involved.

    That said, I do have in my head ideally what I'd like to happen to me!!
    I've been with my boyfriend for nearly 5 years and we have lived together for about six months so far. Part of me is gagging to get engaged (mainly cos I want a nice sparkly ring haha!) but then if I'm rational about it, I want to wait. I dont really want to be engaged for more than a year because in my mind you get engaged to get married, not just for the sake of being engaged. To me it wouldn't make any difference whether my boyfriend was my fiance or my boyfriend. And I dont want to get married any time soon because I just feel like I'm too young. I'm in my early 20s and have only just graduated, got my own place and started out in my career. Now I do love my boyfriend very very much and I certainly couldnt imagine being without him and as far as Im concerned we will get married one day, but I dont want to do the whole get-married-have-kids-settle down thing until I have achieved what I want for me, in my life with regards to travelling, my career, earning and spending my own money etc. I havent lived even a quarter of my life yet (or so I hope haha) - I want to do my 'own thing' for a bit longer before I make a permanent committment to anyone else.

  4. #4
    Member Fjarskafinn's Avatar
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    I will be getting married when I'm 23.

    We've been practically best friends for 3 years, and something just clicked a year and a half ago, and we realised we're completely made for eachother (incredibly cheesy line, but anyone who knows the feeling will agree with me here).
    We spend whatever time we can together (But he works in York, and I'm in Nottingham) and I lived with him for four months over the last two summers. We've seen eachother at our worst, and we know we love eachother no matter what mood we're in.

    It's not an ideal situation to be in in terms of living arrangements, but I don't think it would change anything
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  5. #5
    Senior Member tacosareyummeh's Avatar
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    Well yeah, I agree it depends on the people, I'm just saying for me personally the way I listed it is how I want it to be.
    If another couple wants to get engaged earlier than a year then more power to them, I just don't think I could tell if the guy I was with was marriage material before that.
    Age probably has something to do with it too, when you're older and have been through a marriage or engagement before things will probably end up changing.
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    Ears: Left forward and standard helix, left tragus, left daith. Right rook, right double inner conch. 1g and 14g lobes.
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  6. #6
    Professional Piercer Just_vix81's Avatar
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    I met my hubby when I was 18 moved in with him after 5 months and got engaged got pregnant just over a year of being with each other (but lost the baby) we had our daughter after 3 years of being together then got married after 5 years and had our sn the year after, we have been together 10 years this january coming and still very much in love.
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  7. #7
    Senior Member cherryd69's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tacosareyummeh View Post
    Well yeah, I agree it depends on the people, I'm just saying for me personally the way I listed it is how I want it to be.
    If another couple wants to get engaged earlier than a year then more power to them, I just don't think I could tell if the guy I was with was marriage material before that.
    Age probably has something to do with it too, when you're older and have been through a marriage or engagement before things will probably end up changing.

    tbh after u have lived with someone for a short while u kinda figure enough out about them. Warts an all

    I dont think age plays that much of a part in it, but i suppose past experience does?

    if the person is open honest and genuine... then its 99.99% fool proof, no relationship is ever 100%
    ~Hi im Dawn~

    what iv got

    Double nostril, Tongue web, Tongue, Vch 2mm, Helix, Lobes 3.4mm, 2x 1.6mm double left lower lip. Ink x4

    what i want
    Cheeks, Double right lower lip, Conch, Navel. More ink


    R.I.P septum + nipples



    Nick

  8. #8
    Senior Member insideout's Avatar
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    I'm not that bothered about getting married. It's always seemed pretty much pointless to me...although it's more the stupid big fancy wedding I hate the idea of, haha. I may end up getting married, but I'd rather just run off to a registry office on our own ;D I hate weddings. Thankfully my boyfriend feels pretty much the same way so if we ever got to that point at least we'd agree on that, heh.

    So...I don't really have much opinion on the rest of it tbh as it's not something I've ever really put much thought into. My parents being divorced probably has something to do with that as I can't remember them being together at all, and my mom also got divorced from her second husband too so I just...don't see the point. To me it's not much more than a bit of paper and a ring, and I don't wear rings anyway. ;D I'd rather have engagement-plugs lulz.

    I think the amount of time also depends on the couple - maturity level, how old they are, etc. If I got engaged now I'd still think it was way too soon/too young - even though I've been with him for 2.5 years.

  9. #9
    Member Fjarskafinn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by insideout View Post
    ...although it's more the stupid big fancy wedding I hate the idea of, haha.
    Same here. I know how I'd like my wedding to be, and it'd save us a hell of a lot of money, but my family really want to see me do the whole shebang.

    I know people will think "It's your choice, do what you want" but I don't want my parents and grandparents pestering me with their disappointment for the rest of my life.
    Current: 2x lobes, 6mm | Tongue (centre) | Tragus | 1x Helix | Lip (centre)

    Next up? Sternum surface | Moar Helix | Nine-pointed star tattoo | "wyrd bi ful ard" tattoo

  10. #10
    Senior Member insideout's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fjarskafinn View Post
    Same here. I know how I'd like my wedding to be, and it'd save us a hell of a lot of money, but my family really want to see me do the whole shebang.

    I know people will think "It's your choice, do what you want" but I don't want my parents and grandparents pestering me with their disappointment for the rest of my life.
    Ah, screw them. Let them pester! Maybe just have a family party afterwards or something for it rather than having them all there at a huge wedding. I'd be well embarrassed to have 200 people staring at me walking down an aisle, ergh. Pretty much like my worst nightmare, I hate people looking at me and being centre of attention.

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