+1 respect is a 2 way street :)Quote:
Originally Posted by Coraz0ndeOro
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+1 respect is a 2 way street :)Quote:
Originally Posted by Coraz0ndeOro
Because often people have an attachment to their biological children that clouds their judgment and makes them unable to see what little monsters their kids really are.Quote:
Originally Posted by Coraz0ndeOro
I never said they were crazy, only that I do not understand why they want/have children. As for whether they have the worst lives ever, there's really no way to know, is there? It's commonly known that not having kids makes you freer in many ways to achieve personal goals and enjoy life. Kids take up time, energy, and resources. They're a drain on money, energy, and everything else. People blow off work and friends because their kid is sick. My former coworker lost her job because of her daughter being sick.
Sure, some people might make great parents, but they would make good nurturers to adults, and maybe occasionally to kids they didn't pop out if they feel so inclined. It doesn't mean they have to have kids. Just because someone would make a good parent doesn't mean they should have their own kids.
This is how I feel about my friend. She is funny and awesome and in my opinion, sexy. I think she's great with kids and that's wonderful, and she should spend her life being around kids if she wants that. I don't think she should have her own children. Most simply because I don't want her to, but also because she's too awesome to have kids. I know she loves to travel and experience things, and having kids would seriously impede on that. She has already been through a lot of sad things in her life, having kids would just give her more problems and stress. She deserves to enjoy life. I also can't imagine not having her in my life in some way, and if she had kids, I'm really sad to say I would lose time with her.
Maybe this is a bitchy thing to say but it's how I feel. I would prefer nobody responded to it as it's just my thoughts written down but I know someone will.
Sorry I just think that sounds creepy and controlling....thats MY opinion. And no offence but why post on a forum where people will respond and ask that they don't. Maybe there is a power/control issue you need to address again there. And you can comment on anything I say, I expect you to, this is a public forum afterall.Quote:
Originally Posted by swimmingthroughrain
Maybe start a personal diary? So then you can write it down but no one will be able to comment/judge/have an opinion? It really helps some people.
You are probably the most self-centred person I have ever encountered. You can see only your own view and care so little for anyone else's it irritates the life out of me.Quote:
Originally Posted by swimmingthroughrain
We are all subjected to your "woe is me" attitude in every, single thread on this forum. You ask us for understanding of your position all the time, yet not once have I seen understanding or compassion on your behalf for the views of others. You come across as small minded, shallow and bigotted and it drives me demented. There is no mystery to me why you wouldn't want children, or cannot see why others do. You would be totally unable to share any aspect of your life with someone else. I am so glad that you have chosen not to inflict your small life and views on another person.
I think it is always up to an individual if they want children or not. Always. I would never judge someone whatever their view. My sister has been adament from the age of 9 that she would ever have children and now (at 25) she still feels the same. I have never once told her "she would change her mind" and I respect that some people will never feel the maternal/paternal insinct. That is fine. That is up to them.
You post views that are hurtful, nasty and small minde and then try to get out of them by pretending that "it's your problem" and you should get over it. IF you know that, then don't post it. Likewise if you don't want a response to your opinions, don't post them. I have ignored your comments so many times, I have ignored the times you have changed the whole point of a thread to suit your own needs, but you go too far.
I don't understand why you are continuously allowed to post what you want, say what you want and get no recompense, but I for one cannot put up with it anymore.
I cannot travel as much as I perhaps could if I did not have children, I cannot go out at the drop of a hat, but from everything I have seen I am still happier than you. My children give me unconditional love and I am happy to have them. It is a personal choice It doesn't suit everyone, it definitely wouldn't suit you as you are so self centred and selfish, but that is up to each individual. Then again, a suicidal pigeon is happier than you. Every day my life is hard. I have been beaten up, abused and misued for most of my life. I am now bringing up 3 children on my own and fighting a long, protracted court battle against a mentally unstable, child abducting arsehole. I am still more positive than you. MY CHOICE is to have children and as for someone being "too awesome to have kids" WTF are you on? You don't even make any sense. ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! You irritate the living crap out of me.
It's okay, I don't expect a response. this is just my thoughts written down. Still, I know you will ....
Sure kids are expensive and time-consuming, and they do limit your freedom, but for people that want them all that stuff doesn't matter because they get other positives out of their kids that make up for losing that stuff. I don't want children either (the thought genuinely terrifies me) and although I don't get the whole 'need' to have kids, I do understand that other people have it. For some people the ability to have a family is one of the most important things in the universe to them and they will go to any lengths to get it.
It does annoy me when people seem to think that they know my head better than I do and say things like, 'you'll change your mind when you get older'. Of course there is the minute possibility that might happen, but it's extremely unlikely so stop trying to tell me how I feel!
WTF, "she's too awesome to have kids?" So who should have kids then? People who are rude and stupid and don't want to do anything else? And yeah, people blow off friends and work because of kids because for most people, family comes first. And of course they take up a lot of time and energy but for a lot of people it's worth it. I want kids someday but I'm going to wait until I can afford it and, most importantly, until I'm done with my life being all about me.
Do you think people should just stop having kids and transferring their compassion to adults? That makes no sense at all...
Let your friend do what she wants; it's her life and you don't call the shots for her.
I am unhappy for other reasons but I would be much more unhappy if I had kids.
I expected a response like yours. I respect that you feel that way. But truthfully you don't really know me.
I would never try to control my friend. If she wants to have kids she will. I don't try to control people. I never have.
If you pay attention I said it's fine that she likes being around kids and takes care of kids. Yes, adults need to be cared for too and having your own kids is something else entirely from babysitting or providing childcare.Quote:
Originally Posted by Coraz0ndeOro
I guess I would not want her to read this, I wish I could delete it but I don't see the point since people have quoted me.
I agree with this completely. The more awesome people should be the ones having kids, ones who are terrible people shouldn't because they don't have the capacity to raise kids the right way.Quote:
Originally Posted by Coraz0ndeOro
Of course people start blowing off their friends when they have kids, being a parent is more important than going out and having a good time!
Definitely. Saying someone "puts off their friends to spend time with their kids" might be a good argument against 16-20 year olds having kids by choice or something, but when most people reach a certain age they'd rather start a family than have a crazy, fast-paced life.Quote:
Originally Posted by tacosareyummeh