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  • Yeah I'll be ok thanks My ex wants me back and it's everything I want and he didn't do anything wrong so I'm happy, but it just feels so weird now. I'm just scared he hasn't gotten over whatever obstacle he was facing/wanting to be by himself, because obviously I don't want to get hurt again. But then I was really happy with him and he said it hit him full force that he was being an idiot and he loves me. I guess it won't feel 'normal' now. So we're going for a meal next Weds and I'm just using this time to think about what I want/need for this to work, if it all.

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    • Originally posted by Mints View Post
      Yeah I'll be ok thanks My ex wants me back and it's everything I want and he didn't do anything wrong so I'm happy, but it just feels so weird now. I'm just scared he hasn't gotten over whatever obstacle he was facing/wanting to be by himself, because obviously I don't want to get hurt again. But then I was really happy with him and he said it hit him full force that he was being an idiot and he loves me. I guess it won't feel 'normal' now. So we're going for a meal next Weds and I'm just using this time to think about what I want/need for this to work, if it all.
      Look after yourself sweetie and if you do get back together and it works then great! But...if he has another "whatever obstacle" moment again, you may want to wonder what it is that's making him back off and if you're willing to be dropped each time he does it. <3

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      • Originally posted by Hazel View Post
        Look after yourself sweetie and if you do get back together and it works then great! But...if he has another "whatever obstacle" moment again, you may want to wonder what it is that's making him back off and if you're willing to be dropped each time he does it. <3
        Yeah I am doing, I want him to sit me down and explain it all again next week and then if I feel ok I want to take things slow, I hope I can trust him that he won't leave again. I've told him I need him to be 1000% sure. But in the meantime I'll just get on and keep myself busy like usual. Thank you <3

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        • ARGH me and Carl could finally be out of his dads house for good! Don't get me wrong, I love his dad and I love living here but it was only supposed to be a temporary thing, over 2 years later and we're still here! We've got a house viewing tomorrow with a really nice landlord, and can be in by the end of feb/start of march! SO excited!

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          • I don't even know anymore.

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            • Originally posted by Emzyminx View Post
              ARGH me and Carl could finally be out of his dads house for good! Don't get me wrong, I love his dad and I love living here but it was only supposed to be a temporary thing, over 2 years later and we're still here! We've got a house viewing tomorrow with a really nice landlord, and can be in by the end of feb/start of march! SO excited!
              Ooooh how did it go hun?

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              • I have a boyfriend!

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                • I've got a kind of complicated relationship/non-relationship. There's a guy I love (who loves me too) that I have known since childhood. I moved away and he later expressed his feelings for me. We had a long-distance relationship, and then he broke it off. And then we got back together, and he broke it off. And then we planned to go hang/camp together, and he broke THAT off. And he always drops off the face of the earth and randomly messages me about how he needs "closure" and for us to end, before later messaging me the complete opposite. Anyways, I still love him but needless to say, my mother now hates him. I am now moving back near my hometown (close to him) and we would like to start things up again. The issue is that my mom hates him and we barely know each other now, but for some reason we still want to be together. I have no dam idea how this will work out...I hope it doesn't blow up in our faces.

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                  • Originally posted by Hazel View Post
                    Ooooh how did it go hun?

                    AMAZINGLY!!! We sign the tenancy and get the keys this Sunday! It's a beautiful house!

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                    • Originally posted by Emzyminx View Post
                      AMAZINGLY!!! We sign the tenancy and get the keys this Sunday! It's a beautiful house!
                      Yaaaaaaaaaaaay!!! So happy for you, you both deserve it!

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                      • Originally posted by MxSherwood89 View Post
                        And judging by the crap-ton of porn I found on his computer today, I have officially never felt more pointless. Why am I even here?
                        So, 6 months later, apparently this is STILL a thing. It's ridiculous, I've just started a new job, I should be excited but all I can think about every time I leave the house is him getting off to other women. The girls in work can see I'm not happy about something but I can't tell them because frankly it's just embarrassing. And judging by his internet history he's even been looking at it when I was in the damn house, like WTF?

                        I know a lot of people don't care if their partners watch porn but in the last few months I've been lucky if he even gives me a hug. Genuinely believe he doesn't want me anymore and it's killing me.

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                        • Originally posted by MxSherwood89 View Post
                          So, 6 months later, apparently this is STILL a thing. It's ridiculous, I've just started a new job, I should be excited but all I can think about every time I leave the house is him getting off to other women. The girls in work can see I'm not happy about something but I can't tell them because frankly it's just embarrassing. And judging by his internet history he's even been looking at it when I was in the damn house, like WTF?

                          I know a lot of people don't care if their partners watch porn but in the last few months I've been lucky if he even gives me a hug. Genuinely believe he doesn't want me anymore and it's killing me.
                          Sod what anyone else thinks of it, this is your relationship and your feelings. Does he know you know? Doesn't seem like he's trying to hide it or anything. Did you confront him last time? Can't imagine it's an easy sotuation to be in, I'd be very upset.

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                          • Originally posted by Hazel View Post
                            Sod what anyone else thinks of it, this is your relationship and your feelings. Does he know you know? Doesn't seem like he's trying to hide it or anything. Did you confront him last time? Can't imagine it's an easy sotuation to be in, I'd be very upset.
                            He knows full well what I think of it after the tantrum I threw last time. Last time he blamed his depression which he went and got treatment for - I don't think it's working anymore. He insists it's nothing to do with me but there's no easy way to shake this feeling.

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                            • Aw Sam I feel the same as you, I'm incredibly lucky Nick (as far as I'm aware) has always respected that. My ex, not so much though.
                              If you ever want to rant/chat/virtually hang out give me a shout here or on facebook <3

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                              • Originally posted by MxSherwood89 View Post
                                He knows full well what I think of it after the tantrum I threw last time. Last time he blamed his depression which he went and got treatment for - I don't think it's working anymore. He insists it's nothing to do with me but there's no easy way to shake this feeling.
                                That's so shit hun, I'm so sorry you have to go through this, it would break my heart tbh and it's nothing to do with being open minded or anything like that when he's not active with you and whilst you're in the house? HUH?

                                Also I appreciate depression causing someone to not be active/close to their partner and many people use porn as a quick help along in the self-help dept but he seems to be making a hobby out it which isn't right :(

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